llegando

There's this idea in the US of 'arriving' I'm not convinced of.  People will say stuff like "I know I've arrived when I make a six figure salary...live in this neighborhood...been to this many places...have this many children...can hire a driver..."  While I don't think setting attainable goals is inappropriate, I do think it's silly for people to be convinced that once they have arrived at said goals that they'll be content.

It's human nature to always be chasing after different ways to make us happy, to make us feel whole.  These different ways often come in one of two forms: relationships or possessions.  Relationships are great (well, great relationships are great), and some possessions are great and necessary, but they won't make you happy.  They just can't.  We, humans, weren't made to be satisfied/fulfilled by things that we create.  While they might satisfy, fill that void, for some time in some capacity, we're always thirsting for more.

Look at pop stars who came from humble/rough beginnings.  When they weren't famous, and were just dreamers, their definition of 'arriving' was something like: I won't have to go hungry, I can live in a safer neighborhood, I can buy a house for my mom.  But once they actually arrive at that point, they want one more car that they just had to have, or they'd like a beach house on the Mediterranean, or they'd like a different, better spouse, or a couple more endorsements.  Their 'arrival criteria' keeps getting more and more extravagant.  It's insatiable!

It happens to us little people too.  We compare what we have and how our lives are to those around us.  I see people I went to college with who make over double my yearly salary simply because they chose a different profession, and I tell myself "I need to make more money."  It's hard not to compare because there's always something bigger and better out there.  There's always that job that has everything you want, or that car that has more pistons and leather, or that person who has a better body than you, or family that has it all together, or that person who is a better athlete than you...Blah blah blah.  When we compare, suddenly our arrival point looks a little plain, played out.  We begin to think we can do/be better.

The good news is we can do/be better!  The bad news is it's not as easy as working a few more hours so you can afford leather interior in your new car.  I think we have to choose to soak up every great bit of our lives AT THIS VERY MOMENT.  So for me, when I'm feeling frustrated with arrival plans, I can stop and look at all the great things in my life right now:  I live in an excellent house with superb women, I'm certainly never starving, I have three jobs which all help support my bills, etc.  Once we learn to be sincerely grateful for what we have here and now, I believe we'll be content with no concrete 'arrival point'.  Yes, we'd like this or that, but our lives aren't empty because we don't have those things.

Choose to see your life as full, yes there may be room for more, but you won't notice if you're too enamored by all that you have already.